Two years

Hello It's been so long since a late night post such this!
I'm just finished watching some videos made when highschool. About memories and beautiful moments,times when everybody were so young and skinny haha. Yeap and suddenly the blue feeling sticking on me now. Prepare to get bored when I say I miss them, everybody. I miss our classroom, how warm it is sitting by the window, I miss the craziness and togetherness and the spirit. Every single day is a highlight,everything is just irreplaceable. I couldn't help to smile,laugh and almost shedding tears on the same time!
Credit goes to Edric for mixing up my feeling hahaha.I miss musketeers. From the day we left highschool until this very second :')
But as what I read, I find it true, that the past is like salt, you wouldn't get your life tasty without it, but watch out for it may become too salty when you put too much!

Noww,days here are busier than bees lately, preparing for the finale event! Maybe I'm going to resign on the next sems. Everybody and everything is so much fun. But it just doesn't goes along with my principal. I guess one year is enough for me. I may miss the chance,but idk, I just can't forecast!haha

So I'll mapped my life. What I wanna be,what I wanna do. What I want to accomplish and achieve. Not dreams, but goals. Everybody here has started to run the race,even a little, and I'm still wandering around learning things. No problem, I take different road with my activities now,but I believe somehow it has big positive impact for my further road.

" Everybody have their own soil,seed,sun and water. The matter is how to plant the seed to get the best flower." It is the parable of life.

Hue and Saturation

Hi Im not on a hundred percent these days. People say whatever choice you made, there is always sth to be sacrificed.Now it just came through my mind, did all of this worth it? Yes I love it,I have fun and learn so much while working on it, but now it all seems a lil bit useless (?). Im scared what's on my mind will proven to be true. Is this how everything works in society?
My journals are balanced, but I started to feel my life aren't.All of my time, friendships,energy, and myself everything just doesn't feel right anymore. I wish there's a guide book on telling me what and how to do the right thing in any conditions.

Bluuue

Hellow again bloggie…. Feeling soo blue right now. I’m just homed after all of those workload with very close deadline. My body now is just a bundle of meat and I have nomore power to get up doing anything.Hot shower always make my day. Im homesick, I miss mom, and I need someone to share everything Ive been through today. I want to get over every never-ending to-do-list. I want massage, and hairspa, a cup of tea and a deep sleep. And when I remember what I consider friends in college, I just feel lost. My nature is not that type Im sorry, Im commited to finish what I start. I love my activities now, I’d always wanted to do these stuff. And is it me who’s different or what,but  doesn’t  a good friend supposed to understand or support you  no matter what different activities you have, with or without them? This is my choice and my life and people can say anything abt me but it wont change a thing. It’s not me who make me choose when I never want to. Sorry If Im not good enough.Friends who never appreciate you, makes me think twice is it still counted as ‘friend’ ?

THIS!

Thirteen

 HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I can't be satisfied more when finally the servant give me that conedhat! Haha me versus servant was a long story!

can't resist the cuteness!

This very week

Belated merry christmas everyone hohoho!

This week's highlight is a big YEY for finishing the finale exam, the rumour of doomsday is a joke,Christmas, and im not back home yet :D okay, if this post is written by me in the past one&half year, i must be crying missing home.But now Im in the midst of joy on holiday. Forgot to check and book a ticket home is not so regretful. I always wanted to spend my year end here enjoying this unemployed momments. a little bit messy though, sleep damn late,wake up 2hours before lunch and skip breakfast, spending money like insane and then cry for how much left on my purse. But keep calm and enjoy because this is my holiday rarara! Unfortunately,the weather here turns nuts. since 21st till 3 days afterward, this town has had a terrible thunderstorm. and yeah what comes next is jam and flood. everywhere.

Back then on my spare time, i must 've working on my little jobdesk, but the enthusiasm is faaast evaporate! it's just on my last post that i feel so excited welcoming holiday to do these stuff but i keep giving myself reasons to postpone doing this and that. i dont even start anything. and the more i procrastinate the more the enthusiasm fly away. i need a little push :(

Two years here sometimes i feel myself change a little bit. not on how i look but my point of view.It changes on the way I think. Adapting is not easy but once i try to fit in, it changes me. and sometimes im scared to be out of track. maybe what minus from me is some principal. I might became too high when having fun that i lose myself. and im afraid, because when you're too happy, something bad might be following. i really need a resolution for the new year!

j

what i really learn, is not to mazed by temporary happiness..but to cherish things around me

because you'll never know when will they gone. and leave you with nothing.